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I really am not feeling my best right now

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#1 hamstery


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Posted 09 January 2012 - 10:49 AM

Soooo okay I just had to put all but 10 of my hamsters up for adoption I really miss them all just havent been taking it well it was for the best of them though I feel so alone right now like something in my life is missing and then to add to it my Dad is in a halfway house and then my Mom and Dad drop a bombshell on me and say they are going back together they tried twice but both times it ended I was 5 last time and now my Dad just asked if he could move in with me he asked for an honest opinion and I said yes and he asked if it was alright to be with my Mom again and I said yes I didnt say yes because I wanted to but out of respect for my Dad I really dont want to and Im afraid to say no to anything my Dad asks me I dont know why but Im afraid to say no. I mean I really dont know if its going to work out well my Dad was addicted to drugs twice my Mom thinks hes changed since last time which was from 2006 to 2011 but I dont think he has because he still smokes and drinks and now he also does chewing tobacco now. I just dont want to see him fight with my Mom again they used to have huge fights and when he used to fight with my Step Mom the police had to come each time they said things will work this time and that they werent "mature" enough last time which I doubt, I really dont know what to do... And to top it off I cant tell anyone my parents are dating again Im not aloud to

Edited by hamstery, 09 January 2012 - 10:59 AM.

#2 GangstaGirl


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Posted 09 January 2012 - 11:25 AM

Oh Mike. :hug: losing part of your life is really hard, especially when its little fuzzies :sad: Sometimes, it's better for us to let go of something we love; it opens your eyes to other things in life. It seems like this is something you can't control, and although it hurts, and it feels like something is missing, the best thing you can do is accept that they will live happy lives, and their new owners will definitely take good care of them. :yes: It can be so easy to forget things like that because you're sad, but calming down and looking at the big picture can do you wonders :thumbsup:

Problems with your parents can be the hardest times. :sad: If you're not comfortable with your dad in your house, you completely have a right to say so. You can tell him that its just not a good time, or you're going through some problems and you want to work them out before he moves in. Give yourself some time to think. Even if you can only delay his arrival, its gotta be better than taking this all in at once. Maybe you still want to help your dad, and you think it would be great to have him move in... but if you're just not ready, or you feel uncomfortable with it, go ahead and tell him its a bad time and you can't do it right now.

Your mom is a whole different situation and you don't want her to get hurt. You don't want her to have to go through another break-up, and although it would be nice to have your parents back together, you think it's too soon. The situation your dad is in might not be best for your mom. I totally understand your doubts about this, and there's no reason to be afraid of telling him that you're uncomfortable about all of this. If he's being responsible enough to ask you if its ok for him to be with her, he will probably be responsible enough to accept your answer 'no'.

Well, best of luck and if you need anything else, let me know! I really hope everything works out. ;D

#3 tinypixie


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Posted 09 January 2012 - 12:44 PM

Dude there is a lot going on for you right now. It's hard when talking to parents, when they ask such honest questions like "what do YOU think is the right thing for me to do?" But you are not them.

You are an adult, but you will never know what it's like to be either of your parents, or to know what they feel for each other. Or perhaps, the rage they feel for each other. Maybe there are good times, but do the bad times overshadow the good?

It's impossible for you to make that call for your Dad. But at the same time, it's hard to "ride out" the chaos that might occur after. You don't want anyone to blame you for telling them what they "wanted to hear" in the moment. In the future, I suggest refusing to answer those questions. It's not your burden.

I'm sorry about your hamsters, Mike :( But maybe they will be okay. And hopefully, so will you.